Warning: Wild Animals on the Loose

Most people encounter wild raccoons or similar undomesticated animals in their neighborhoods.  Me, I live in Suburbia.  Believe it or not, twice within the past month, I have encountered (not that I live in a posh area or anything) wild pure bred poodles.  Poodles.  Just romping along the roadside.  I would have thought had I just seen one that it may have run away but what are the odds of seeing two runaway poodles in the same month.  That is all I have to say today and I'm pretty sure that is all that I need to say.  Nothing in depth.  No serious thoughts to ponder.  I just had to share.  Have a good day.

Seriously? Are You Kidding Me?

Sorry its been a bit since I blogged.  I had some ideas for various blogs and maybe I'll revisit those in the future but what got me off my lazy ass and typing today is that my frustration level is through the roof.  If you've been following along over the last year and a half or so, my family almost adopted a young lady from a state that's Far Away.  We didn't go through with it because she had family in Far Away that claimed they wanted to adopt her.  Even if they didn't formally adopt her, we didn't feel it was right to move her to Suburbia.  (Please see previous posts for the whole heart-wrenching story.)  Well, today I found out that said family members with whom she was living have declared that they no longer want her and she has been moved to yet another foster home.  WHAT???  I can't believe we called off our adoption to keep the girl close to family that pulls this kind of crap.  You can't just change your mind like its a sweater you bought at the mall and want to return.  This is a child we are talking about here!  She is a HUMAN BEING with feelings and emotions and . . ugh!!!!!  I have spent the morning texting with her and I just don't know what I can do to help.  I thought Far Away Child Services sucked before, now they officially super suck in my book.  How could this all happen to someone who has already been through so much in life?  Where is the fairness in that?  It seems that in dealing out crappy situations that God could spread the wealth around a little bit.  So now she sits in yet another foster home and I sit here and feel helpless.  It honestly makes me want to call the Suburbia Child Services and see if the adoption attempt can be reinstated.  I don't even know if that's possible but hell, I could do a better job helping her than any of the people in Far Away could.  Maybe getting as far away from Far Away as she can would be a good thing for her.  I hate feeling helpless.  Today is the first day of my "I'm-not-employed-any-more" celebration.  If I hadn't quit, I would be at work right now but instead of enjoying it, I am in a state of mental distress over this whole thing.  I love this little girl.  Even though we didn't officially adopt her, I still consider her family.  It hurts me that another member of my "family" is hurting.  I worry about her and what she may do if she gets too depressed.  She has been through a lot in her young life - more than most of us will go through in an entire lifetime and right now I just want to scoop her up and bring her here and show her what a semi-normal, loving family is like.  Guess I'll spend the next few hours just being frustrated and depressed until hubby gets home so we can talk about this whole situation.  Fun day.  Things like whether or not to quit my job and weight loss seem so insignificant when you get the sudden view of the big picture of life as I have gotten today.   Here's hoping I can come up with a solution.

The Resignation

I did it!  I officially resigned from my job!
Oh and here was my resignation letter -

I don’t know how to say this, I don’t know how it’s done

But I’m concerned I’ve run my course, this job just isn’t fun 

It was one time way in the past a ministry I thought

But now it’s become frustrating – a ministry it’s not

And so I go in hopes of finding more out there for me

It won’t be hard to fill the office spot I bet you’ll see

I’m giving you my notice, two weeks until I’m done

I want the church to know at times it really was quite fun

But lately things are tough with those overstepping the lines

And venturing to tasks not theirs, to tell the truth they’re mine

As well as folks who volunteered deciding that they’re through

So I’ve been told their jobs fall to me which is not fair if true

And so it is with a sad heart you will not see my name

On the back of the bulletin anymore, the job just isn’t the same

As it was when I started long ago, way back when

So I will be no longer here officially as of May 10

I will miss some of you and wish you well along your way

But due to certain instances I can no longer stay

So good-bye, farewell, see you around and all those other things

It feels so good to finally be spreading out my wings

I feel bad even as I type this and am really on my way out

But before I leave I just have to say I will not miss the Scouts

USPS BS

A friend of mine was telling me a story the other day of his most recent trip to the post office.  He said that there was a line of eight or nine people (when isn't there).  The postal employee called the next customer in line and the woman walked to the counter.  The customer needed one hundred sheets of stamps.  Yeah, you heard that right, one hundred sheets of stamps.  No problem right?  Wrong.  This is the post office.  Things are not supposed to be smooth and easy - let alone quick.  You would think that the employee would punch in the number 100 and then scan a sheet of stamps.  But that's out in the real world.  This was the postal realm where things are not as they should be.  No, the employee begins to scan each individual sheet of stamps INDIVIDUALLY!  After she had scanned in about twenty individual sheets of stamps, the line of people waiting began to get antsy and aggitated.  Noticing this, the postal employee stopped what she was doing and explained to the line that she had to do the transaction this way because if she did it the other way, the transaction was would be too quick.  Then when they do their studies of postal productivity, it would show how fast they were capable of going and the excess slack at the post office would be cut if not needed.  Yeah, you heard that right as well, the postal employee was telling them that she had to go as slow as possible in order for all the people at the post office to keep their jobs.  Are you kidding me?  I mean, we all knew they were slow but admitting it outright to customers.  That just takes the cake.  Nothing like a governement agency that is boasting about their inefficiency.  They are a monetary drain and a financial liability.  Instead of wanting to be productive and show their worth, they are determined to ban together in an inefficient union to protect each other.  Screw the mail and their customers.  The post office is slowly becoming obselete but at least they are consistent and becoming obselete slowly like everything else they do.

I've Been Committed Before, Literally, So Why Can't I Commit Now

Today, I did it.  Well, I kind of did it.  Ok, so I didn't really do it, I kind of wimped out again.  See, I'm trying to quit my job.  I want to quit my job.  I need to quit my job.  But I can't seem to commit to quitting my job.  Which is funny because most people would consider the act of having the job the commitment and the quitting of the job more of a lack of commitment.  But I just can't seem to put in my two weeks notice.  Today, I told my boss that I was 95% sure that I would be submitting my resignation before my next work day which is Tuesday.  That was about as sure of it as I could get in the moment.  I honestly don't know what they are going to do if (when) I leave.  There is no continuity book.  I offered to make one for them years ago but I told them I would need more hours or pay and they said no thanks.  Its not that I think so highly of myself that I think they can't function without me.  I just do stuff in the office that nobody else does which means nobody else will know how to do them once I leave.  My big fear in quitting is that I just hermit myself away from society and do nothing which I really feel I am prone to do but I am committed to making an effort for this not to happen.  I scheduled to go to a Suburbia Women's League meeting next week and may join that group.  I also thought about volunteering at the local public library since I love books or maybe even getting another job.  I'm not opposed to working.  I just feel that after eight years at the same place I need a change.  I've become stagnant.  Its that stubborn Taurusian trait that haunts me.  I get into a place and I don't want things to change.  If there was a tsunami coming, I wouldn't move my beach chair.  What I need to realize is that change can be good, change can be liberating and change is inevitable.  So why not choose to quit while I have the control to quit rather than waiting for them to run out of money, as so many non-profits do, to pay me.  I'll be interested to see if they replace me or just have volunteers do my job.  That would be funny.  I really don't think that they realize what all I did there.  Yeah, sometimes I felt like a monkey could do my job but there are plenty of times where things get beyond the zoo animals and take some thought and strategy.  I'd like to see any one of the people in that organization who are my "customers" put up with their fellow "customers".  It wouldn't last long and it wouldn't be pretty.  So I'm adding to the blog description.  Not only is it a blog about a girl trying to lose weight and find a new therapist, but also one who is quitting her job and revamping her life.  Maybe I should change the name of my blog from "My Thoughful Spot" to "My Mid-Life Crisis".

Warning: May Contain Nuts

I just finished breakfast.  It was good.  It was this cereal that I had bought a week or so ago.  Its called "Nutty Nuggets".  Its the Kroger brand of "Grape Nuts".  The thing that strikes me as so funny about this cereal is that there are no nuts in it.  New Nutty Nuggets - does not contain actual nuts.  Lol!  I guess its a good thing considering if it had nuts in it I would most likely be on my way to the ER due to an allergic reaction.  But it got me thinking, in today's world, nothing is guaranteed to be what it actually claims to be.  Last night I was talking to a girl that I met on a social networking site.  She seemed nice enough but as we talked her story was a bit fishy.  Things just weren't adding up.  Then, I got a message from another friend warning me that the same girl with the same stunningly beautiful pictures and some of the same information had been a friend of hers previously and turned out to be some dude.  So unfortunately after a little more talking and a little more suspicion (and her trying to "surprise me" by guessing my phone number after googling me - don't worry, she got it wrong), I unfriended this "girl".  She kept sending me messages asking why I did it so in the end I had to block her from my account completely.  I felt bad but at the same time I felt stupid and violated.  If she was a dude (and a foreign dude at that - "she" said she was "not well versed in the internet" - who talks like that in America?), how are you supposed to know?  And if she was legit, she lost out because of people who pose as someone they are not and cause us all to be suspicious of each other.  We are all way more vulnerable than we know out there in cyberland.  Hubby said I was right to do what I did.  He said (and I believe him due to the field of work he is in) that not only do creepers and pedophiles lurk out there on the social networking sites but also terrorists looking to get any information they can.  All it takes is an email address and some fake pictures.  Easy peasy lemon-squeezy!  It is a scary world we live in I tell you.  Maybe I should set my own account to the restrictive privacy settings that I have on my daughter's account.  There may be no nuts in my cereal but that's just because they are all on the social networking sites!

From Talking to Stalking in Five Easy Calls

Ok.  Here's the deal.  Remember that therapist that I was seeing.  Well, she called.  Then she called again.  Then she called another time.  Then she called this past Friday.  Then she called this morning.  She is just not getting the hint.  Actually, its not just a hint.  Its what is obvious.  I am not calling her back therefore I am not interested in seeing her any more.  End of story.  Stop calling.  At this point what she is doing constitutes harassment and if she calls me again I will categorize her as a stalker.  I am glad that I didn't stay with her as a therapist and establish any type of relationship beyond the initial few meetings.  If she thinks I owe her after just those few meetings, I'd hate to see what she feels about her actual patients.  I owe her nothing.  She keeps saying she wants to know what my plans are.  My plans are not to call her back and to get on with my life.  I have a new therapist and I am happy with her so far and even if I was thinking of coming back to you, your relentless calling would have stifled that idea.  Can you say creepy?  That's what I am living through at the moment.  She is going out of town tomorrow so I may call her answering service and leave a nice blunt message with them that she cannot misinterpret.  But then again, I don't feel I owe her anything.  I don't have to explain my plans or intentions to her.  I am not coming to see her anymore.  What else is there to understand?  Whatever.  We are on our way in a few minutes to go to the back to discuss student loans and parent loans for that matter.  I'm not looking forward to this but it has to be done if we are going to finance our daughter's education.  Actually, if I take the money that the stalker ex-therapist wanted me to spend seeing her weekly and put that money toward my daughter's education, I may get it paid off sooner than I thought.  Here's hoping.  Everyone wish me luck and send me a dollar :)  lol